by Pamela Druckerman
About the book: The runaway New York Times bestseller that shows American parents the secrets behind France's amazingly well-behaved children When American journalist Pamela Druckerman had a baby in Paris, she didn't aspire to become a "French parent." But she noticed that French children slept through the night by two or three months old. They ate braised leeks. They played by themselves while their parents sipped coffee. And yet French kids were still boisterous, curious, and creative. Why? How? With a notebook stashed in her diaper bag, Druckerman set out to investigate—and wound up sparking a national debate on parenting. Researched over three years and written in her warm, funny voice, Bringing Up Bébé is deeply wise, charmingly told, and destined to become a classic resource for American parents.
by Amy Krouse Rosenthal
About the book: Before you get to meet your baby, you spend a swell (so to speak) nine months getting acquainted with your growing belly. The first pregnancy journal devoted 100% to you and your belly, The Belly Book is organized by trimester and includes pages for “time-lapse” belly photos and ultrasound images, as well as prompts for writing about morning sickness, food cravings, maternity clothes you never want to see again, and much more.
by Armin A. Brott
About the book: This indespensible book explores the emotional, financial, and even physical changes the father-to-be may experience during his partners pregnancy. Written in an easy-to-absorb format and filled with sound advice and practical tips for men on such topics as how to make sense of your conflicting emotions, how pregnancy affects your sex life, and how to start a college fund, this volume reassures, commiserates, and informs. It also incorporates the wisdom of top experts in the field, from obstetricians and birth-class instructors to psychologists and sociologists. This new edition features the latest research on many topics, from the reasons for premature birth to nutritional supplements. The finances section has been updated; advice for expectant adoptive fathers has been added throughout; information for fathers expecting twins and other multiples is included; and the resources section and bibliography have been considerably expanded. Illustrated throughout with New Yorker-style cartoons that will make even the most anxious father chuckle, this book is the essential reference for all expectant couples.
by Thomas Hill
About the book: In this classic parody, Thomas Hill presents the testosterone-inspired answer to the bestseller What to Expect When You're Expecting.The third edition of the best, funniest father's guide to having a baby, What to Expect When Your Wife Is Expanding, is now thoroughly revised and updated, but it's still packed with information, advice, and attitude distinctively for guys. Originally conceived as a little parody, just something funny and helpful for the expectant man, the book is now a classic gift, passed knowingly from one generation of first-time papas to the next. With this lighthearted, month-by-month instruction manual on the care and nurture of a pregnant wife—the main role of expectant dads—he'll handle all the important milestones and topics: what not to say during the three phases of labor; what to buy, how many, and when; maintaining work-life balance; maintaining work-life-wife balance. New features in What to Expect When Your Wife Is Expanding include: The minefield: the wrong gifts for your pregnant wife Social media pregnancy etiquette: status update! Eight reasons why not to pick out maternity clothesWhat to Expect When Your Wife Is Expanding also features the latest trends! Festive gender-reveal parties. (Really!) Updated baby name guide, including Twitter hash tags. Cloth diapers: The debate is back!
by John Pfeiffer
About the book: There are approximately 3,712 ways for a guy to look stupid during pregnancy - this book's here to help you avoid all(most) of them. And here's your first hint: Focus on what you can be doing for her rather than what's happening to her.She's pregnant. She knows that. You know that. And her 152 baby books tell her exactly what she can expect. Your job is to learn what you can do between the stick turning blue and the drive to the delivery room to make the next nine months go as smoothly as possible. That's where John Pfeiffer steps in. Like any good coach, he's been through it. He's dealt with the morning sickness and doctor visits, painting the baby's nursery and packing the overnight bag, choosing a name, hospital, and the color of the car-seat cover. All the while he remained positive and responsive - there with a "You're beautiful" when necessary - but assertive during the decision-making process (he didn't want to wind up with a kid named Percy). And now it's your turn.She might be having the baby, but you have plenty of responsibilities.
by Louis Borgenicht,Joe Borgenicht
About the book: Offers a whimsical approach to baby care that likens the newest member of the family to a machine needing extra-special care, in a guide that features schematic diagrams for such "maintenance" techniques as getting a baby to sleep through the night and taking a baby to a doctor for "servicing." Original. 30,000 first printing.
by Susan Magee
About the book: The average pregnancy lasts 280 days and the suspense can be excruciating! The Pregnancy Countdown Book starts on Day 280 and counts down the biggest milestones every step of the way with one page of helpful information for each day of your pregnancy. Here are tips from doctors and midwives, amusing anecdotes and quotes, and occasional gory-but-necessary details (if you can define the word "lochia," you know what we're talking about). Every page offers an interesting revelation. On Day 231, your baby will be the size of a blueberry but by Day 168, he'll be the size of a large avocado. By Day 124, you'll need to stop sleeping on your back; by Day 90, air travel becomes a dicey proposition. And if you haven't planned the nursery by Day 45, you're playing with fire. A perfect gift for expecting moms of all ages, The Pregnancy Countdown Book is a delightfully irreverent look at the craziest nine months of your life.
by Heidi Murkoff,Sharon Mazel
About the book: We're expecting again! Announcing the COMPLETELY REVISED AND UPDATED FOURTH EDITION of this bestselling pregnancy book. This is a cover-to-cover, chapter-by-chapter, line-by-line revision and update. It's a new book for a new generation of expectant mums, featuring a fresh perspective and a friendlier-than-ever voice. Heidi Murkoff has rewritten every section of the book, answering dozens of new questions and including loads of new asked-for material, such as a detailed week-by-week foetal development section in each of the monthly chapters, an expanded chapter on pre-conception, and a brand new one on carrying multiples. The Fourth Edition incorporates the most recent developments in obstetrics and addresses the most current lifestyle trends (from tattooing and belly piercing to Botox and aromatherapy). There's more than ever on pregnancy matters practical (including an expanded section on workplace concerns), physical (with more symptoms, more solutions), emotional (advice on riding the mood roller coaster), nutritional (from low-carb to vegan, from junk food-dependent to caffeine-addicted), and sexual (what's hot and what's not in pregnant lovemaking), as well as much more support for that very important partner in parenting, the dad-to-be. Overflowing with tips, helpful hints and humour (a pregnant woman's best friend), this new edition is more accessible and easier to use than ever before. It's everything parents-to-be have come to expect from What to Expect...only better.
by Dawn Dais
About the book: A humorous, realistic, and supportive guide to the first 52 weeks with a baby, The Sh!t No One Tells You is the first book in Dawn Dais's popular parenting series, followed by The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers and The Sh!t No One Tells You About Baby #2. There comes a time in every new mother's life when she finds herself staring at her screaming, smelly bundle of joy” and wishing someone had told her that her house would reek of vomit, or that she shouldn't buy the cute onesies with a thousand impossible buttons, or that she might cry more than the baby. Best-selling author Dawn Dais, mother of two tiny terrors, is convinced that there is a reason for this lack of preparedness. She believes that a vast conspiracy exists to hide the horrific truth about parenting from doe-eyed expectant mothers who might otherwise abandon their babies in hospitals and run for it. Eschewing the adorableness that oozes out of other parenting books, Dais offers real advice from real momsalong with hilarious anecdotes, clever tips, and the genuine encouragement every mom needs in order to survive the first year of parenthood. The Sh!t No One Tells You is a must-have companion for every new mother's sleepless nights and poop-filled days.
by Gary Ezzo,Robert Buckham
About the book: This is an older version that is medically out of date and is currently out of print by the publisher. the authors (Pediatrician Robert Bucknam, M.D. and Gary Ezzo) & publisher recommend pursuing the current edition with isbn 1932740139 which has a pink banner ribbon on the front of the cover. The current and most recent version is the 5th edition, February 2012. We highly recommend ONLY purchasing the newest and most current version of On Becoming Babywise (isbn 1932740139). It has a new chapter, several important revisions, the latest in medical updates, and is 19% longer than the former version. In becoming one of America's leading infant management guides, On Becoming Babywise has continued to improve its methods and practices throughout its 30 years and this latest version is the result of all the best over the last three decades. The Babywise method continues to gain global recognition for its common-sense approach to parenting a newborn. It is an infant management plan offered by Pediatrician Robert Bucknam, M.D. and co-author Gary Ezzo which helps parents successfully and naturally synchronize their baby's feeding time, waketime and nighttime cycles.
by Vicki Iovine
About the book: The practical, comforting, honest, and hilarious bestseller for moms-to-be, with more than one and a half million copies in print! Your doctor gives you medical advice. Your mother buys you baby clothes. But who can give you the real skinny when you’re pregnant? Your girlfriends, of course—at least, the ones who’ve been through the exhilaration and exhaustion, the agony and ecstasy of pregnancy. Four-time delivery room veteran Vicki Iovine talks to you the way only a best friend can—in the book that will go the whole nine months for every mother-to-be. In this revised and updated edition, get the lowdown on all those little things that are too strange or embarrassing to ask, practical tips, and hilarious takes on everything pregnant. What really happens to your body—from morning sickness and gas to eating everything in sight—and what it’s like to go from being a babe to having one.The Many Moods of Pregnancy—why you’re so irritable/distracted/tired/lightheaded (or at least more than usual).Staying Stylish—You may be pregnant, but you can still be the fashionista you’ve always been (or at least you don’t have to look like a walking beachball)—wearing the hippest designers and proudly showing off your bump.Pregnancy is Down To a Science—from in vitro fertilization to scheduled c-sections, there are so many options, alternatives, and scientific tests to take that being pregnant can be downright confusing!And much more! For a reassuring voice or just a few good belly laughs, turn to this straight-talking guide on what to really expect when you’re expecting.
by Jenny McCarthy
About the book: THE RUNAWAY NATIONAL BESTSELLER Revealing the naked truth about the tremendous joys, the excruciating pains, and the inevitable disfigurement that go along with pregnancy, Jenny McCarthy tells you what you can really expect when you're expecting! From morning sickness and hormonal rage, to hemorrhoids, granny panties, pregnant sex, and the torture and sweet relief that is delivery, Belly Laughs is must-read comic relief for anyone who is pregnant, has ever been pregnant, is trying to get pregnant, or, indeed, has ever been born!
by Emily Doherty
About the book: Today’s pregnancy books may no longer recommend martinis and cigarettes to help pregnant women relax, but most offer moms to be a ton of worthless information—like what kind of fruit your baby is the size of at Week 16. Is there any practical value in knowing that your child resembles produce? And where’s the good stuff—the useful details, like beware of the baby registry and all the crap you will never use, or be prepared to get breast milk all over everything you own? Hilarious, candid, and easy to read, Funny Little Pregnant Things is full of helpful information about all the stuff people don’t tell you about pregnancy—the good, the bad, and the ugly.
by Ian Davis
About the book: Finally—A Pregnancy Book That Won't Put Men to Sleep My Boys Can Swim! tells real men everything they really want to know about pregnancy, such as: How much is it going to cost? Why does your wife primp before seeing her doctor when she hasn't put a stitch of make-up on for you in months? And, most important, what's it going to do to your sex life? This rollicking, laugh-out-loud book is for expectant dads in search of bottom-line pregnancy information, without all that boring touchy-feely stuff you find in those books written for women. Inside you'll discover helpful—and hilarious—information and insights on such topics as: The Maternity Wardrobe: "A key part of the maternity wardrobe is maternity underwear—parachute-like undies big enough to fit an NFL defensive lineman." Baby Names: "Don't give your kids mockable names like Thaddeus, which is Greek for 'I'm a dork and should be beaten up.'" The Birth: "No one told me it's normal that babies' heads can be misshapen at birth. I was convinced that my wife gave birth to Veldar, the conehead." From the Trade Paperback edition.
by Bunmi Laditan
About the book: Toddler a**holery is a normal part of human development—not unlike puberty, except this stage involves throwing food on the floor and taking swings at people who pay your way in life. For parents of toddlers, it's a "you better laugh so you don't cry" period. Bunmi Laditan's hilarious, satirical guide to toddlerhood offers parents instant (and very welcome) comic relief—along with the very good news that "It's Not Your Fault." Chapters cover the cost of raising a toddler, feeding your toddler, potty-training, tantrums, how to manage the holidays, and "how not to die inside." Parents will see themselves in the very funny sections on taking your toddler to restaurants ("One parent will spend their time walking your toddler around the restaurant and outside like a cocker spaniel, while the other, luckier parent will eat alone."), Things You Thought You'd Never Say That You Now Say As a Parent of a Toddler ("I can tell you're pooping because your eyes are watering."), and how to order pizza ("Spend $40 on pizza delivery. Listen to your toddler cry for 30 minutes about how the pizza is all wrong. Watch your toddler take a small bite of crust. Google 'can anger give you a heart attack?' Start the bedtime routine."). Laditan's wildly funny voice has attracted hundreds of thousands of fans of Honest Toddler on social media; here she speaks parent-to-tired-parent, easing the pains and challenges of raising toddlers with a hefty dose of adult humor and wit.
by Jill Smokler
About the book: Sometimes I just let my children fall asleep in front of the TV. In a culture that idealizes motherhood, it’s scary to confess that, in your house, being a mother is beautiful and dirty and joyful and frustrating all at once. Admitting that it’s not easy doesn’t make you a bad mom; at least, it shouldn’t. If I can’t survive my daughter as a toddler, how the hell am I going to get through the teenage years? When Jill Smokler was first home with her small children, she thought her blog would be something to keep friends and family updated. To her surprise, she hit a chord in the hearts of mothers everywhere. I end up doing my son’s homework. It’s wrong, but so much easier. Total strangers were contributing their views on that strange reality called motherhood. As other women shared their stories, Jill realized she wasn’t alone in her feelings of exhaustion and imperfection. My eighteen month old still can’t say “Mommy” but used the word “shit” in perfect context. But she sensed her readers were still holding back, so decided to start an anonymous confessional, a place where real moms could leave their most honest thoughts without fearing condemnation. I pretend to be happy but I cry every night in the shower. The reactions were amazing: some sad, some pee-in-your-pants funny, some brutally honest. But they were real, not a commercial glamorization. I clock out of motherhood at 8 P.M. and hide in the basement with my laptop and a beer. If you’re already a fan, lock the bathroom door on your whining kids, run a bubble bath, and settle in. If you’ve not encountered Scary Mommy before, break out a glass of champagne as well, because you’ll be toasting your initiation into a select club. I know why some animals eat their young. In chapters that cover husbands (The Biggest Baby of Them All) to homework (Didn’t I Already Graduate?), Confessions of a Scary Mommy combines all-new essays from Jill with the best of the anonymous confessions. Sometimes I wish my son was still little—then I hear kids screaming at the store. As Jill says, “We like to paint motherhood as picture perfect. A newborn peacefully resting on his mother’s chest. A toddler taking tentative first steps into his mother’s loving arms. A mother fluffing her daughter’s prom dress. These moments are indeed miraculous and joyful; they can also be few and far between.” Of course you adore your kids. Of course you would lay down your life for them. But be honest now: Have you ever wondered what possessed you to sign up for the job of motherhood? STOP! DO NOT OPEN THIS BOOK UNTIL YOU RECITE THESE VOWS! I shall remember that no mother is perfect and my children will thrive because, and sometimes even in spite, of me. I shall not preach to a fellow mother who has not asked my opinion. It’s none of my damn business. I shall maintain a sense of humor about all things motherhood.
by Karen Alpert
About the book: Following the success of Go the F**k to Sleep, Confessions of a Scary Mommy, and Ketchup Is a Vegetable, a collection of funny, warm, and charmingly profane tales from the frontlines of parenthood by the author of the popular Baby Sideburns blog. Once upon a time you and your partner had a perfect life: dinners out, weekend mornings cuddling in bed, brunch with friends. Then you gave birth to a poop machine (or two). Now, it's all about the pediatrician, breast pumps, princess dresses, and minivans. And discovering that your pride and joy is actually a little A-hole. When your son wakes you up at 3:00 A.M. because he wants to watch Caillou, he's an a-hole. When your daughter outlines every corner of your living room with a purple crayon, she's an a-hole. When your rug rats purposely paint the kitchen ceiling with their smoothies, they're a-holes. At times like these, it's only natural to want to kill them (or yourself). But it's against the law (and there's the suicide hotline). Plus, there's that whole loving them more than anything in the whole world thing. In I Heart My Little A-Holes, Karen Alpert shares hilarious stories, lists, and deep thoughts on the joys and horrors of raising children. Accompanied by cheery illustrations and photos I Heart My Little A-Holes will make you laugh so hard you'll wish you were wearing a diaper.
by Karen Alpert
About the book: Now that I’m a mom, I know the most painful part isn’t getting something giant through your hooha. It’s having a real live child.If you are the kind of mom who shapes your kiddo’s organic quinoa into reproductions of the Mona Lisa, do not read this book. If you stayed up past midnight to create posters for your PTO presidential campaign, do not read this book. If you look down your nose at parents who have Domino’s pizza on speed dial, do not read this book.But if you are the kind of parent who accidentally goes ballistic on your rugrats every morning because they won’t put their shoes on and then you feel super guilty about it all day so you take them to McDonald’s for a special treat but really it’s because you opened up your freezer and panicked because you forgot to buy more frozen pizzas, then absolutely read this book.I Want My Epidural Back is a celebration of mediocre parents and how awesome they are and how their kids love them just as much as children with perfect parents. Karen Alpert’s honest but hilarious observations, stories, quips and pictures will have you nodding your head and peeing in your pants. Or on the toilet if you’re smart and read it there.
by Nicole Knepper
About the book: If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place.Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts.Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.